Why do we do that?

August 23, 2013

Marriage is rooted in tradition, yet it is uncanny how many brides accept and integrate these time-honored customs without ever really taking the time to understand how they got started. It will make your ceremony that much more meaningful if you are aware of how these traditions came to be and why they serve a purpose. Once you are educated about their genesis, it might even cross your mind to leave some out or tweak them to fit your own beliefs.

Bridal Veil

There are a plethora of theories as to how this tradition got started. One thing is for certain, the tradition of the veil links back to cultural beliefs. For the Romans, brides had custom veils drape them from head to toe and would later use this same veil as a shroud for their burial. In other antiquated cultures, where arranged marriages were prevalent, the bride as hidden under her veil until the ceremony was complete so that the groom could not back out of the “arrangement” due to her appearance.

Bouquet Toss

Flowers are incorporated into the ceremony in order to represent fertility for the bride. In England, wedding guests would want to gain the good fortune that had been bestowed on the bride and so would try to rip pieces of her dress and/or bouquet to keep with them. In order to keep from getting ravaged by guests, the bride would throw her symbol of fertility and luck (the bouquet) into the crowd and it was believed that the recipient was next in line to be married and bear children.

Tiered Wedding Cake

It was customary for guests to bring sweets to the celebration. They would pile cakes and other treats on top of a table. One French baker thought to emulate this look by creating a singular cake that tiered onto itself, and thus, the tiered wedding cake was born.

Giving Away the Bride

In the spirit of arranged marriages, brides were used as a currency. The fathers would barter with their daughters and would receive crops/ land/ etc. in exchange for their daughters’ hand in marriage. While we have come to know the tradition of a father giving his daughter away at the alter as a purely sentimental exchange, its origin was a symbol of a business transaction.

Wedding Ring

Have you ever wondered why the third finger is the designated “ring finger”? If you suspected this selection was simply arbitrary, you have not done your homework! The Romans believed that the third finger has a vein that runs all the way to the heart. The fact that the band is a circle is meant to represent eternity.

Knowledge of history is always a beneficial tool; an understanding of these few traditions will hopefully help to ground your marriage even more in what is the past in order to fully experience and appreciate your future.